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A group of seven teenage girls slips through the thick brush of the Amazon. Krystal, Amanda, Monica, Emily, Jennifer, Tamie, and Jessie had wandered too far from their exotic dance camp. NDA said that this year they wanted to offer their dancers a more cultural experience. The Superbowl just wasn’t good enough for these good ol’ girls. Joni (the coach) was at a meeting, so now was the perfect time to go explore. Silly girls left breadcrumbs to find their way back to camp, but the Amazon is so moist they just melted into the ground. So the girls were lost. Jen (who was always right) figured that they had been going south most of the way, so if they just traveled north they could head back to the village. Unfortunately they didn’t have a compass, and the canopy of the rainforest kept them from being able to see the stars anyway. So they just sent Krystal to climb up a tree and see if she could see any lights in the distance. What luck! She saw the light of a flickering fire in the distance! Eager to get back to camp before Joni found out they were missing, they started running in the direction of the fire (in-step all the way, of course). When they arrived back at camp they just kind of slipped in with everyone else, because everyone seemed to be just running in-step around a campfire. They thought it must have been some sort of camp game. Slowly they all started to look around as they were running in the circle with the others. They were dressed kind of funny… They had also tanned really well in that one day. And… this cauldron is kind of large… Just as they notice the cauldron, a human hand rises to the surface of it. Jessie, the captain, yells at the top of her lungs “Pinball!” The girls all run into formation, looking a little chaotic as they figure out who’s going to go where. By this time they definitely had the attention of the headhunters. Somehow the musicians of the tribe didn’t notice, though. They kept on playing. Jessie calls out: “tribal mix!” So the girls counted off “5-6-sev-8!” And they started dancing their hearts out. This dance would no doubt have been the highlight of their performing careers had they not been so terrified. The shook and shimmied, and the villagers rejoiced. They spinned and leaped and the villagers rejoiced. Then they finished off with an awesome kickline, and the villagers looked pissed. The 4 girls who had been in the back row (Krystal, Amanda, Monica, Emily) had kicked their way back into the forest. It was, like, a totally brilliant plan. The other three were smiling brilliantly in ending position and even counted off the walk off, which they decided it best no to to do. The other four girls plan had left Jessie, Jen and Tamie stuck there alone with the headhunters who were approaching with their pointy staffs. They looked over their left shoulder, their right shoulder, then huddled together screaming. Right as the first headhunter lunged in to stab at them they dispersed and started running away back into the dangerous woods. The headhunters were in heavy pursuit. The girls screamed as they found the head of their teammates on staffs at the perimeter of the headhunter land. The last words of the final three were… Jessie: “Stay in step!” Jen and TK: “Screw in-step!” As not much later Jessie ran into the heads of some cheerleaders who were also at the camp. She pulled an about-face and got all three of them skewered. The moral of this is “never leave your bedroom after dark at dance camp.”
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